I think I'd rather stay dirty.

The worst place to be caught in a zombie invasion would be in the middle of a shower.  First of all, you're in a tiny room, generally one with no, or very small, windows, so you're essential trapped, and one can only do so much with a plunger or toilet brush, and unless you have a straight razor, there isn't much to use to fight with, unless the zombie is deathly afraid of spearmint.  Second, you'll be wet, and while that might seem like an advantage in that you'd be slippery and the zombie would have trouble catching you, it also might mean that you could slip and fall, or be caught and slip out only to crash into the wall.  Basically, it seems like a good way to prolong the suffering rather than shorten, or avoid it.  Third, you're not going to be wearing any clothes, and while that fact might not matter initially, later, like less than a minute after you're safe, you'll probably become pretty self-conscious about it, and since you were just attacked by a zombie it isn't like you can just pop into the bedroom and get some decent attire.  Nope, you'll pretty much be stuck in your birthday suit.  You might have time to grab a coat on the way out, but honestly, how many people have long coats just sitting by the door?  Then there's the weather.  It could be cold, but it's not like you could stay in the house, what with a zombie in there and all, unless you've left a baseball or cricket bat right outside the door and all you need to do is to get to it and get rid of the zombie, but really, why wouldn't you have taken it into the bathroom with you?  Even if you did, though, bathrooms can be tight, so you might not be able to get a good swing off, which means that you still might end up zombie chow.  I guess really the only way to get cleaned up, if that's what you want, though I'm still a little torn about whether zombies have a good sense of smell, or are attracted to the scent of spring flowers or melon, is to employ the buddy system and have someone guard the door.  That way, if the zombie does attack, they'll either get the person on the other side of the door first, and maybe, just maybe, that person will be enough and the zombie will shamble off with a full tummy to someplace else, or they'll be dead.  Either way, you'll be clean.  If that's what you really want.

So what's next?

Vampires seem to be running out of steam.
They're turning into yesterday's news.
Soon they won't be nearly as visible as they once were.
At least, that's my opinion.
And sooner or later, zombies will join them.
Sure, they're hot right now, but sooner or later people are going to get tired of seeing them.
So who will be the next monster to take the reins?
Werewolves?
Frankenstein?
A mummy?
No, wait.
That one already has a series.
How about Bigfoot?
It has been a while since Harry and the Hendersons.
Maybe it's due for a comeback.
Me, I'm rooting for a Creature from the Black Lagoon type monster.
I think that one's due, and most people seem to forget about the poor guy.
Yeah, that's what I want to see.
I probably won't, though.
I don't think it's safe enough.
But I think that with the right story, it could be pretty darn neat.
So here's to you.
See you on the big screen, Gill-Man.

But probably not.

Happy Halloween!

Go forth and be scary.
(But not scary as in "That guy should be arrested," scary.  Nobody needs that.)

I don't trust this guy.

But I trust him even less because I know what he's done.
Oh, you two...

I'd rather not buy it twice.

I think that if you already own the album, you should be able to get the music videos for free.
You shouldn't have to buy the song again just because you like the video.
There should be a way to do it, either by including a code in the booklet, or by giving the music program the ability to find the song itself.
And yes, I do realize that the producers and whatnot who create the video would probably not go for this at all since it would essentially be giving away their work for free, unless the person didn't already own the song and just wanted to buy the video.
(And yes, I also realize that there will be those who don't buy the album and still get their hands on it and therefore get the video for free, but they were going to get that album for free anyway.)

The title of that file no longer makes sense.

The war happened before this story started,
And I don't think there's one in this book.

I played last year, just to see if I could win.

I don't think I'll play this year.
I keep running into walls.
And nameless people.
And plot holes.
Great, big plot holes.

It's only fair.

Every month it seems like there's something new that you can die from, or some new cause to take up arms for (well, not literally take up arms for, but you know what I mean), and many, if not all of these, have their own ribbon.  Yet, if you ask people, they'd probably come up with three right away (pink, red, and yellow), and then be at a loss to come up with anything else, possibly throwing out random colors but not knowing the causes associated with them. I think that there's an opportunity here to get the word out, and make a little money.  Stores already sell things for breast cancer awareness and whatnot, so why not have a rotating collection of products promoting whatever that month is about.  They wouldn't even have to go all out on the t-shirts and stuff, but could focus on things like pens, pencils, watches, ribbon pins, ties, bracelets, charms, beads, or other small items where the proceeds would go to that specific foundation/cause. That way, the cause/issue would be brought the forefront, if only for a month, and let's face it, some of these things really need curing, or at least supporting. You could also probably depend on there being at least one group of people who, if the pin, charm, or bead route was taken, would make it their mission to collect them all.  Anyway, it's just a thought, and as the title says, it's only fair.  One cause should not rule them all.

Battleship has a lot to live up to.

The Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots movie was much better than I thought it would be.

Especially after the one robot got his block knocked off because well, I would have been very disappointed if it hadn't happened at least once.

All in all, I had a very good time watching the Rocky IV robot movie.

What?

You didn't see the connection?

It's there, and you could probably say that parts of the other Rocky movies are too.

That, and Thunderdome.

Huh.

I guess on second thought, this movie really was made for me.
Plus, there was that one scene where the robot did The Robot...

(I may just have to own this one.)

I won't say that life isn't fair.

I'll only say that it should have warned me before I spent all of that money.

But I guess that's life, too.

We're going to need a lot of plywood. And nails. Lots of nails.

Upon serious reflection, I have come to the conclusion that my apartment is ill-equipped to withstand a zombie invasion.

(Thanks a lot, The Walking Dead. I feel so safe now. Not that it'll stop me from watching. I just have to finish the bomb shelter first :).)

You know it's only a game, right? Right?

People take things way too seriously these days.

Sports.

Politics.

Different ideas.

All so that they can find another way to hate someone else.

(Tell me it isn't true.)

(I wish it wasn't. Really I do.)

(I guess that's why tomorrow I'll be wearing a shirt chosen specifically because it is a color not found on the uniforms of either team.)

(I just don't want to deal with the morons who feel the need to point things out and make themselves feel superior by making others feel inferior.)

(You know who you are.)

(I hope.)

Of course he would know.

That was the point of the letter, wasn't it?

A few more pieces have fallen into place.

And a few more have fallen off the board.

I hope I don't need them.

But if I do, I'll just look on the floor.

Still wrestling with those darn snowy trees.

But on the plus side, I finally know what Santa's going to look like.

Puppy!!!

That's why I'm loading up on box sets and old movies.

(And really, anymore these days, aren't they all?)

I don't think you're saying what you think you're saying.

Store songs. The background noise of the shopping experience. The same tunes that seem to pop up wherever you go. How annoying they can be. Confusing too. But only if you've actually taken the time to listen to the lyrics, which, for the most part, most shoppers probably haven't, which is probably for the best. Otherwise, I'm not sure that they'd want to shop anymore. But hey, at least we've got some research that proves that these songs work, or at least seem to. Still, if you hear them enough times, there comes a point where you start to actually listen to the lyrics, and it is at this point when you, or at least I, start to wonder just why they picked that particular song, and if the picker or the songwriter knew what they were doing when it was picked or created. I hope the writer did, but you never know. Sometimes somebody sees something one way and someone else sees it another. It happens. Trust me on that. That's why I've decided to narrow in on three of the songs that always make me wonder just what was going on when they were chosen. I'm sure there are more. I know there are more, but these three always stand out to me for one reason or another, so for the sake of brevity, I'm sticking with them, unless I go into work today and another one catches my ear.

The first of the tragic trio that I've selected is "I Will Be Waiting," by Daphne Willis. On the outside, this song has a nice upbeat tune. It's bouncy and unassuming and just makes you want to walk around. At least it did at first. Then, after the nine hundredth time hearing it, I started paying attention and things got a little crazy, or at least the song did. Maybe I'm wrong, though. Maybe there really is nothing more romantic than locking up your significant other, but really, after listening to it enough times, I can't help but picture someone in a dark house, waiting by a door for someone else to come inside, and once they do, the door will be slammed shut, the lock clicked into place, and escape impossible. Cheery. Then again, maybe I'm listening to it the wrong way. Maybe it's just about the loss of a relationship. Maybe it's just about that longing for things to go back to happier times. Then again, maybe I'm right and it is kind of creepy, but not outwardly creepy. Maybe it's just another song following in the grand tradition of "Every Breath You Take," by The Police. On the outside it seems like a lovely song of devotion. On the inside it's a little darker and creepier.

The second member of the trio is "Papercut," by Apollo Drive. Yet another song about love and loss (I think there just might be a theme going on here). So we've got our singer and he's sad. Very sad. Very, very sad. Get the boy a box of tissues. Obviously, he's just broken up with his best gal and not taking it very well. Okay, I'm fine with that. It happens. You're sad. I get it. You're getting a little melodramatic there, but okay, the emotions might still be a little raw, so it's understandable. That understanding starts to fade when the song reaches the chorus and things start to get weird, particularly the lyric that goes "Oh I miss how it feels when we touch just like a paper cut." Now, I don't know about you, but I know I love to get paper cuts, especially when I can get them from those thicker cardboard-like papers they sometimes use for tags. Blood. Nothing says I love you like blood. Right? Hmm. The jury may still be out on that one. No wait. Actually, I don't miss paper cuts. In fact, I try to avoid them at all costs. They hurt, they bleed, and they ruin a good day (and possibly a good shirt or pair of pants). Sorry sir, I guess you lost me there, and I'm starting to think that you don't miss that girl as much as you want us to believe. In fact, I think you just want some attention. I think I know just the girl for you. How do you feel about locks?

Finally, the third member of the trio is a rather popular gal with a rather popular song you've probably heard many, many times...whether you wanted to or not: Taylor Swift and her song, "Love Story." Okay, I get it. You're young, you're in love, and nothing is going to keep you apart. You're just like Romeo and Juliet (but you're not that song). Personally, I wouldn't want a relationship to be that song. After all, you do remember what happens at the end of the play, don't you? And you do realize that that play was a tragedy? Or did you somehow miss the last scene and the line about how "never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo"? Personally, I'd rather not have a love like that. I like my life, for the most part anyway, and I'd like to see where it's headed. I don't think Taylor wants it either though, since the very end of the song spins away from the play to a happier, livelier ending, which probably helped sales because I don't think the song would have been as popular had it ended with the young lovers killing themselves. (Parents' groups would have probably gotten a little angry, too.)

So, what have we learned? A bouncy or inoffensive tune can hide a rather dark message. Kind of like those teenage tragedy songs. You just kind of bop along to the beat, not really listening to the lyrics, or only listening to a smattering, and think "Hey, this is a fun song." Then one day you actually listen to what's going on and you think "Hey, that's not what I thought this was about. That's actually kind of messed up. Oh well, I still like the song. Tra la la." Okay, perhaps you don't add the tra la la, and perhaps you even stop listening to the song, or not, but still, whenever you hear it, you remember that it isn't really just about sunshine, rainbows, lollipops, and puppies. (Except for maybe Taylor Swift's, though she does have that song about how she broke up with her emo boyfriend, but that one's not trying to be anything other than what it is: depressing, which makes me wonder why it's also a store song. Who knows, maybe a depressing song makes people buy more in order to get back those good feelings, so it all evens out in the end...until the credit card statement arrives.). All in all, each of these songs is kind of like a kitten. All cute and fluffy on the outside, but inside its hiding its claws and fangs, waiting, if only innocently and not knowing any better, to bring on the pain. Boy, I can't wait to go to work tomorrow.

And so it begins.

It's time to start reading about that other wizard named Harry.

The one who doesn't live in Chicago.