Surprise, surprise.

Okay, so I'll keep this short. I knew they weren't going to win. Getting to the end of round one took all but about ten minutes of the show, there was at least another round to go, and I was pretty sure that it wasn't going to end on a cliff hanger. It's just like how I know when watching detective shows that when they find the culprit thirty minutes in, the guy they've just nabbed probably isn't going to be the one who actually did it, or there's going to be some sort of twist involved. (I told you this would be short.)

Meet Gordon.

He's a gnome.

(I'll give you a moment to get the jokes. Yeah, jokes. Plural. Sorry.)

Apparently, he's also very interested in mysteries, sailing, and exploration.

I had no idea.

In loving memory of Old Lead Legs

Grounded in life,

Forever flying in my heart.

It's nice to be appreciated.

That's why I'll get my photos developed at Walgreens again.

Because if no one else likes my pictures, at least the lady who developed them does.

(I do too.)

Flowers for my mother.

And a smattering of butterflies thrown in for good measure.

There's a Dogface,

a Red-spotted Purple on an apple branch,

a Regal Fritillary with an American Painted Lady flying over some purple cudweed and Canada thistle,

and two Silver-bordered Fritillaries with some Vervain.

The sun always shines on our lawns.

Greetings friends,

The long winter has finally come to an end, the lush green lawns of spring have returned, and with them the dandelions, brightening up yards across the country. Unfortunately, some people still don't appreciate these lovely little flowers, focusing instead on their so-called "weediness," and we think that's a shame. For without dandelions, the desks of teachers, and the kitchen tables of countless homes, would be drab, bare spaces. Without dandelions there would be no dandelion greens in salads. Without dandelions there would be no sunshine on a cloudy day. Yes, my friends, the world would be a darker, less magical place without the noble dandelion. (And need we even mention what would become of the wishes made when the gold turns to fluff?) Still, this is not to say that we believe the world should be covered in dandelions. Too much of a good thing can quickly turn into a bad thing, and we do appreciate the sight of a perfectly manicured, beautiful green lawn. We just don't want to live in a world that looks like one big golf course. This is only what we believe, of course, and we do not wish to impose our beliefs on others. That is simply not the dandelion way. So as you go about your day, catching glimpses of golden pockets of sunshine, we ask that you take a moment to consider what the world would be like without them. If the thought breaks your heart, then you know how we feel, and if not, if you think the world just doesn't need them, we understand and wish you only the best.

Respectfully Yours,

The Dandelion Appreciation Society.

They're not weeds, just misplaced flowers.

The thing is boys, we've got a lot of these gizmos, and I gotta tell ya, they just don't work.

Every time we flash the Die Fledermaus signal, he disconnects his phone and leaves town for a week.

Wait...what?

Today's classical music programming has been made possible through a contribution from Bob Smith* in honor of Winston Churchill's bloody minded determination to defeat Nazi Germany.

*Bob Smith is not the name of the actual person. I don't remember what name the announcer said, though I'm pretty sure this is exactly what he said.

I've heard a lot of things on the radio, but I never expected to hear something like this.

So who's really more important in this song?

The man who was just a hundred yards from Mary Anne,

Or Dan the pony, the only one of the two travelers to be given a name?

Don't laugh at the moon.

It already gets upstaged by the sun.

Poor thing.

Maybe that's why it's slowly drifting away from us.