Happy Memorial Day.

I hope you don't have to work.

I do.

I think that might be one of the reasons.

When did it become necessary to bring snacks when you go shopping?

You did that on purpose.

Tricky, tricky Next Blog link.

You must have read what I wrote.

Now I couldn't find a foreign language blog if I tried.

You know what?

I kind of miss them.

I hope they come back soon.

I think...

I would like to try stained glass again.

And play the clarinet.

And paint that picture I've drawn in my mind.

And buy another cactus.

And find a spider plant to replace the one that died years ago.

And I'd like to make some more woodblock prints.

And go see some roadside attractions.

And knit a hat.

And maybe a sweater.

And maybe something that's not a scarf.

And finally finish the scarf I started a while back so that it can join the others.

And I'd like to get my dinosaurs back.

And buy another opera.

And go to the park and play on the swings with a friend.

And maybe go down the big slide if it's still there and they haven't replaced it with something safer.

And I'd like to be able to say that I've finished the book.

And that someone could read it.

And that they could tell me what they thought of it even if I'm afraid to know.

And I'd like to go to the moon.

And Bryce Canyon to see the hoodoos.

And the zoo.

And most of all I'd like to actually do any of the things I just listed.

That high school Spanish just isn't cutting it, I'm afraid.

Every time I press the Next Blog link at the top of the page, it seems like I either get sent to a Spanish page or a page in some other language. Now, at least with the Spanish ones I can try to figure out what they're saying, but when it comes to the others, I'm just lost. Still, that didn't stop me from bookmarking one I believe is from Norway because the guy's a photographer and I like to look at the pictures, so I guess maybe not knowing isn't so bad after all.

There was really no need to broadcast it around the world.

So she fell.

Big deal.

I trip on air at least once a day and I'm sure the security cameras at work have captured it happening.

I don't care.

It's what I do, and if I worked there, it would probably still happen.

It'd probably happen somewhere really important, too, with lots of cameras.

The really important thing we all should have all taken away from this was that gravity was still working.

Someone needed to test it, and the responsibility fell on her shoulders and she fell on the ground.

Myself, I'm glad to know that someone is testing for it besides me.

After all, I can't do all of the testing myself.

:)

(I still don't think it's news, though.)

It's because I love the books that I don't want to see them hurt.

So it would seem that The Dark Tower has been handed off to yet another team of Hollywood people. Yes, my friends, The Tower has been passed from J.J. Abrams, Damon Lindelof, and Carlton Cuse to Ron Howard, Brian Grazer, and Akiva Goldsman. I've got nothing against any of them, and they seem to be saying a lot of things right now about movies and television series and movies connected by television series, but seeing as how this is at least the second group who have taken on this story, and the fact that the story has yet to appear on the screen, I'm not holding my breath that it's going to happen and I'm going to be able to sit back and eat popcorn as I watch Roland, Eddie, Jake, Oy, and Susannah make their way towards The Dark Tower.

In fact, I don't really know how to feel about all of this. I've always looked at the prospect of bringing The Dark Tower series to the screen with mixed emotions. After all, the darn thing took up just about six months of my life because I decided to read all of the books in order with no other books in between so that I could really get a good feel for it and remember everything. It was a great six months, though, and I'm glad to have read the books, and I think it was a series that I could actually say, "Yes, that is how it should have ended," instead of "Huh. So that's it? That's what you're going with? That's how you're going to end this? Ooookay. It's your series, I suppose." Plus, it really looks like quite an achievement when they're taking up almost a quarter of the bookshelf, but getting back to the movie, or television show, or whatever...

Now, I've always heard about the idea for a movie or series of movies, and in my honest opinion, I never thought it would work, and that opinion hasn't changed. The way I see it, you could probably do a movie for the first and maybe second book, but after that, the different parts of the story become very interconnected as things end in one book and then begin again, stopping only because you run out of pages to read, and then resume in the next book. Then there are all of the plot strings. Getting all of those to work in a movie, or series of movies, well, that would be pretty darn difficult and I'm going to come right out and say this: I think it would make the creation of The Lord of the Rings look like filming a cakewalk.

I think, and have always thought, that if this story ever made it to the screen, that it should be in the form of an HBO series, where you could take care of all of those strings, get everything in order and then meander down the path of the beam without worrying about how long it's going to take because if people are going to watch it, and if you do it well, they're in it for the long haul. I also think that HBO could handle the special effects that will be necessary. Also, by doing it as a series, while you're working on the beginning stuff, and taking into account that the show is popular and people are watching and you're actually going to be making a series that covers all seven books, you could concurrently film all of those backstory things so that everyone is still the right age and you have those parts when you need them instead of filming them as you need them, which is what would happen in a movie and would mean that either the characters would keep age jumping on you, or you'd have to keep recasting the roles, which I don't think is a very good idea and could end up being pretty darn confusing for the casual viewer.

Still, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself because no one ever seems to mention that if it did come to the screen, there are all of those other film rights, book rights, and property rights that have to get sorted out. I won't get into those, but you'd probably need more than a few lawyers to get them all squared away, if they can be squared away, and if you've read the books, you know what I'm talking about. Of course, that's taking into account that it would ever be done. That's taking into account that HBO would even want to do it and since it looks like they're gearing up to begin producing a show based on a different as yet unfinished fantasy series, I don't know that they'd exactly want to pick up the tale of the gunslinger right now.

I didn't buy anything, but it still made my day.

The hooks in the dressing room at the Marshall's I went to had labels with things like "Definitely" and "Maybe next time" printed on them. (I don't believe that there was one for the things you didn't want to buy, but hey, you don't want people not buying things, right?) I thought they were neat because they followed the logic of how people shop and what happens when you try on a lot of items all at once. You end up with different piles and the hooks are a neat way to keep everything in order. I don't know, maybe it's just me. Maybe I've spent too much time cleaning out fitting rooms, but I still think they're cool.

(Yes, I think that kind of thing is neat. I know...)

If it wasn't true, they wouldn't be selling it.

For every song that you think is the absolute worst ever made, there's someone who loves it with all of their heart.

The same can be said for some of the songs you like, too.

I know that it certainly applies to some of mine :).

How offensive!

It seems like they're always saying that math is the universal language, and how if we meet up with alien life, that that might be how we're able to communicate with them, but what if they're wrong?

What if math is how aliens curse?

My blog. My rules.

I have made a decision: for the time being, Mark and Dick will have to fend for themselves. I just keep getting farther and farther behind and the number of strips I have to catch up on is just getting too long, and frankly, they're both in pretty good places to hang it up for a little while. Now, I'm not saying that I'll never do pick them up again. I might. I might not. The fact is, right now it just isn't as fun as it used to be because it's turned into something of a job in addition to all of the other stuff I've been doing. Something had to change, and that something is them. Sure, I'll keep reading them. I might even post something about them if a particular strip strikes me to be especially funny, but I won't be following the stories here any more. If you want to follow them, read them yourself. Now, this isn't to say that I'm hanging up the blog, because I'm not. I'm going to keep it going. The randomness is going to continue. I've got ideas for other things I've been thinking about trying, so I'm going to give some of those a shot with the extra time I'll have. (Ha, ha, ha. Extra time. That's a good one.) Anyway, them's the breaks, kids. Just thought you'd want to know.

Obey the rules of the road.

For those who are about to take a driver's test, and are a little anxious about filling out all of those bubbles, here are a few rules of the road to remember:

1. Don't hit the blind man and his dog.

2. The red octagon with STOP printed in the center of it means stop.

3. Buckle up, it's the law (or at least it is here.)

4. Construction zones mean that you need to slow down, not go faster.

5. Any alcohol is too much alcohol.

6. Don't read this list while texting and driving. (Really, it's not that important and there will be time enough to read it when you're sitting there waiting for your number to be called.)

Finally, it is important to remember that this is not how a stop light should be interpreted:

Green means go.

Yellow means go faster.

Red means go really, really fast, close your eyes, and hope for the best.

I hope this has been both enlightening and informative.

Good day.

I had no idea it was so scandalous.

Looking up the "Theme From 'A Summer Place'" on iTunes, I couldn't help but notice the little "clean" indicator next to certain versions of it. I had no idea that this particular instrumental song contained objectionable material in need of censorship. (Did a violinist drop his instrument and swear, the curse somehow going unnoticed until now?) It makes me wonder what the non-clean version sounds like.

(Do you think the folks at Relax-O-Vision know about this?)

Spread a little sunshine.

Greetings friends,

Looking out the window, it's clear to see that the lawns have come out of their winter hibernations. Flowers are blooming, bees are buzzing, and everywhere you look nature is bustling with activity. It is at this time of rebirth and regeneration that we of the Dandelion Appreciation Society would like to remind you of the unsung heroes of the lawn, who year after year require no replanting, and who year after year work to make your lawn a more colorful place. We speak, of course, of the noble dandelion. Yes friends, we understand that there are those out there who would like to see these little yellow flowers wiped off the face of their lawns, but we would like to take a moment to think about what the world would be like without dandelions. For one thing, it would be far less colorful, and in many ways, less magical, for without dandelions, how would your thoughts and dreams be carried on the wind? How would you be able to tell if you were in love? How would you know what time it was? Without the humble dandelion, many of these questions would go unanswered. Then there are the children. After all, dandelions were the flowers you could pick without risking punishment, and who among us did not gather a bouquet of them for a teacher, a mother, or a caregiver? Who among us did not at least try to make a chain of dandelions for decoration or fashion? Friends, flower chains should not be reserved only for those with daisies. We believe they should be available to all and that the flowers they're made of are a vital part of growing up and life in general. Dandelions have, and always will be, magical. Without them, it would be a much drabber world, and one we're not sure we'd want to be a part of. So as you go about your business, feel free to stop and smell the roses, but as you do, don't forget to take a moment to enjoy the dandelions too.

Respectfully yours,

The Dandelion Appreciation Society.

It's only a weed if you say it is.