Thursday, January 8, 2009

He smells like motor oil and coffee, and you can too!

Well look what we have here.  It's the latest thorn in Dick Tracy's side: Angelorious, marketing expert and interested party in the Dick Tracy toiletries line because for some reason both men and women want to use what Dick Tracy uses (even if he's never actually used the stuff and has no plans to use it ever).  Needless to say, Dick doesn't look too happy to see her (I told you he should have made his escape when he had the chance), and now it seems that he's destined to become swept up in all of the toiletries madness (even though I thought that they were only going to be selling perfume, and if you're just selling perfume door-to-door, do you really need a marketing expert?  Wouldn't a cheery disposition, a good product, and comfortable shoes be better?).

As for Angelorious, there are three reasons why I don't trust her.  The first is that she has a cone shaped head.  That can only mean that she's some sort of alien and that whatever this perfume (or whatever it is) is, that it's really some sort of tenderizer or flavor enhancer so that when the rest of her people come to Earth for The Great Feast, all they'll have to do is pop people into the giant oven.  The second is that she appears to have no eyeballs.  We've already dealt with someone like this before, and I hope that the excitement of Dick's robot adventure hasn't made him forget about his run-in with Shirl.  The third reason is that Angelorious' smile is just too darn big and I half expect her to try to sell the Tracys a junk car or a timeshare by the end of the strip.  There's also the issue that it looks like she's wearing a mouth guard, which means that at any moment she could start swinging, putting Tess, who's still suffering the effects of T-Rex arms, at a significant disadvantage.  (I'd also watch out for those earrings.  They could be grenades.  I need to stop watching so many action movies.)  We'll just have to wait and see what Angelorious' true motives are.  The only thing that I can say for certain is that I'm going to get really tired of typing Angelorious before this is all over.
And just in case you hadn't already put the pieces together as to who this explosion prone man that Diet and the CIA man were talking about, we see Professor Noll (or is it Dr. Noll?) run into a little trouble with some chemicals, but I say let's not be too hasty about that WHOOM.  For all we know, the good doctor was making a very large paper mache volcano in his basement for the science fair and this was just the result of him mixing the vinegar with the baking soda (that, or he decided to try out the Mentos/Diet Coke experiment for himself, but wasn't content to settle for a single bottle trial and instead bought out the entire stock of both at the local grocery store).

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